I Can't
by The Muse of Deduction
Summary: Cecil's had enough. Carlos refuses to let the best thing that happened to him go so easily. The masked army is definitely more focused than the scientist. And Cecil's sister is pissed.


**A/N: Hey! So this just kind of happened while I was typing the first chapter of another WTNV fic I'm planning. Let me know what you think maybe?**

**. . .**

"I can't do this anymore Carlos. I just can't."

Cecil's voice could always make him feel like everything was going to be okay when the world was falling down around him. Now, with his phone clutched loosely in his right hand, looking out at the vast desert, it made his heart stop.

His world was crashing down with less than ten words.

"Cecil?" Carlos croaked, not trusting himself to say anything else but that name. He could hear muffled crying, even though Cecil had moved the phone away from him. What was happening? How could he not see this coming? A scientist was supposed to be observant.

He didn't even notice his relationship falling to pieces.

"It's been a year Carlos," Cecil said, his voice translating a sort of tiredness that wasn't helping Carlos' worrying. "Have you even tried to find a door?"

"I have tried Cecil!"

A short humourless laugh met his reply. "And how long ago was that? You don't even call Night Vale your home anymore. Forget that, you haven't said that you would be coming back to me in just as long. It's always me coming to visit you, not you coming backto _our home. _The one you suggested we'd get together."

"What do you want me to do Cecil? Night Vale rejected _me, _not the other way around." As soon as the words left Carlos' mouth he wished he could take them back. He was just propelling the conversation into the direction he hoped would never appear in their relationship.

"I want you to actually try and come home! I want you to put me first instead of the desert for the first time in months!" Cecil's voice cracked near the end and a muffled sob escaped his lips.

Carlos had caused that. He had made Cecil feel inferior compared to science. It did seem that his boyfriend had to fight for his attention at times.

Cecil mistook his silence for resignation and filled the silence. "I can't wait for someone who's already given up Carlos. I want to believe you'll come home to me, that we can go back to our usual routine but I just can't do this anymore. I miss you so much and it's just killing me –"

"I miss you too," Carlos said, trying to stop those words that he knew were coming. He had to save the best thing that had ever happened to him. He couldn't let this slip away from him. Not when it had almost been snatched away, when he was left with 'what ifs' while lying in the bowling alley.

A genuine laugh this time. A happy one.

It wasn't going to be enough.

"I'm sorry Carlos. My perfectly imperfect Carlos," Another sob, voice cracking as he continued. "It's over. I do hope we see each other again –" The host's crying was unbearable now. Carlos had caused it, caused his wonderful boyfriend to cry.

"Cecil!"

The line was cut and Carlos was left staring dumbly at the phone. He was vaguely aware of the army of masked warriors approaching, having been gone for days now. It was only when Doug came to stand in front of him did he finally find his voice.

"Cecil broke up with me." Saying it out loud just made it real. It felt as if someone was crushing his heart. "I've spent so much time focused on science that I didn't realize Cecil was hurting."

He had definitely won the 'World's Worst Boyfriend' award for the rest of his life.

"I lost the most important person in my life because I didn't take the time to tell him that." Tears blurred his vision and Carlos ducked his head down and swiped at his eyes. Doug didn't acknowledge that and simply waited for Carlos to continue.

"I was thinking about proposing you know. Before I got trapped here and after we moved in together. I never did because it was too early to of course. But that's how much he means to me. I feel like I've known him for forever and I love him so much. And now I can't because I'm stuck here!"

He let the tears fall. If they were from sadness or frustration, he wasn't sure and it didn't seem to matter. Before he could register what was happening, Doug had picked him up and was carrying him somewhere, towards something. It was probably the reason why they were gone for so long.

At first it seemed like a little blip in the desert, nothing special. As they got closer and Carlos could vaguely tell what the blip was his heart leapt. Doug lowered him in front of their discovery and Carlos laughed.

He was standing face-to-face with an old oak door. And someone was knocking on the other side.

"Thank you, all of you, so much," Carlos said, turning to the army. "You've done so much for me. I wish I could repay you somehow."

Alisha came to stand by Doug and signed something to Carlos before gently pushing him towards the door. Carlos nodded, understanding their message.

"I will try to visit," he said before knocking on the door in response. The door flung open and Carlos gave one last wave before walking through.

He was back in Night Vale. He was _home. _

Carlos faintly registered John Peters, y'know, the farmer, Old Woman Josie and some of her not angels surrounding the door in a half circle before a woman with lavender hair and violet eyes that Carlos recognized to be Cecil's sister broke through the crowd.

He noticed that her eyes – both the pair in her head and the tattoos on her hands – were glowing. He had only seen that happen to Cecil when he was extremely happy or extremely angry. Carlos was leaning towards the latter as Annalise stalked towards him and before he could explain anything, she had slapped him hard across his right cheek.

"How. Dare. You," she growled, looking as if she was going to strangle the scientist. Annalise didn't allow him to say anything before she continued. "Three days. For three whole bloody days my baby brother's been calling you, trying to tell you that there was a way back. Even after you broke up he wanted you back here. I knew an outsider would hurt him but did he listen? NO! So give me one reason why I shouldn't toss your sorry face out of my town!"

Carlos was impressed that he didn't take a step back or try to run from the woman. She was absolutely frightening when she wanted to be. He faintly recalled the talk he had received when he had been dating Cecil for three months.

The scientist stood tall, despite everything in his mind telling him to run. "Where I came from Cecil had just broken up with me. I haven't gotten any calls about the door, but the masked army led me to it. As for a good reason not to throw me out of town, it would make Cecil sad. And it wouldn't give me the chance to fix things."

Annalise was quiet for the longest time, eyeing Carlos as if she was going to kick him out at that moment. Old Woman Josie put a hand on her shoulder and Annalise sighed, resigned.

"How can I be sure you won't hurt him again? I don't want to see him like that ever again," Annalise said, shaking her head. "How do I know you won't just leave him again?"

"You can't," Carlos replied simply. "But I want to ask him to marry me, if that's alright with you."

Her mouth quirked upwards for a fraction of a second and nodded before motioning to her car. "Let's get you cleaned up."

**. . .**

Carlos was sitting on the hood of his car at the Arby's in a fresh set of clothes and a new lab coat. Annalise had been kind enough to give him a bit of a haircut so it was just the length Cecil liked it. The radio was tuned in to Cecil's show.

The scientist had sent him a text earlier asking him to take a picture of the lights above the Arby's for him. He knew Cecil had read it since he had switched to a pre-recorded message a second after. It felt like an eternity before the weather came on and Cecil's car pulled up in the parking lot. The host didn't notice him.

"Hey Cecil."

The host turned around slowly, purple eyes widening when he caught sight of the scientist. He stood, rooted to the spot, torn between running towards him or his car. Carlos smiled, hopping off the hood but staying where he was.

"Give me another chance?"

The wait was physically painful to Carlos. What if he miscalculated and Cecil was over him?

It was a relief when Cecil let out a shriek of happiness and ran to hug the scientist, almost toppling them both to the ground.

"My perfectly imperfect Carlos, I am so so sorry –"

Carlos cut off his apology with a kiss. "It should be me apologizing," he said, pulling away to look at the radio host. The year apart had taken its toll on the both of them, but right now, his face alight with happiness, Cecil looked perfect to him.

"I've been stupid," Carlos started, holding both of the man's hands. "So stupid for staying away so long. I made excuses because I was scared that I would never find a door without realizing how much those excuses would hurt you. I love you so much that, scientifically speaking, I couldn't love you more but somehow, everyday, you make me fall in love just a bit more until I'm sure my heart will, metaphorically, explode. I want to ask you two things tonight Cecil. Will you forgive me?"

Cecil smiled and nodded. "Of course Carlos. What's the second thing?"

Carlos grinned as he pulled out the box in his pocket and went down on one knee. Cecil's eyes widened and his hands flew to cover his mouth.

"Will you marry me?"

The radio host let out some sort of noise and nodded. "Yes! Yes, a million times yes!" The man pulled him up and into a kiss and everything was perfect.

"Don't you have a show to get back to?" Carlos asked, resting their foreheads together. Cecil's smile dropped as he realized the weather was almost over.

"Station Management will not be happy. See you at home?" Cecil asked, almost as if he was worried Carlos would disappear again. The thought made the scientist's heart break.

"Of course. I'll see you soon, at our home," Carlos replied, kissing his forehead right on the third eye tattoo.

**. . .**

"_Dear listeners, you'll never guess what happened during the weather. Carlos, my perfectly imperfect scientist boyfriend, proposed! Yes, he's back in Night Vale! I apologize for rushing, but I hope you all understand that there's somewhere else that I'd rather be right now. So goodnight Night Vale, goodnight."_

**. . .**

"Cecil? Are you awake?"

"I was. What is it?"

"Your sister scares me."

"I know. She scares me too. Goodnight Carlos."

"Goodnight Cecil."


End file.
